Have You Talked To Me At All This Year?

If you have, then this next statement will not surprise you. Motherhood is hard work, Y’all. It is thankless and unappreciated hard work. Not just hard work a couple of days a week when you work overtime, but twenty-four/seven hard. Hard like before I eat – YOU eat. That even-when-I-feel-like-I’m-going-to-faint kind of hard, or not-going-to-the-bathroom-because-you-are-sleeping-so-peacefully hard (and even questioning if-I should-start-wearing-diapers hard!)

Motherhood is humbling. No matter what my title is outside of the home or what accomplishments I may have; when I am home I am “The Help.” My sole purpose is to figure out what each cry or point means and to provide entertainment on demand. I eat leftover food that may or may not have fallen on the floor. I keep him clean while my own clothes are soiled. That’s just the scratch of the surface.

The hardest part by far for me is the emotional pieces of being a mom. Your heart walking outside of your body is a real thing. My child has ripped this heart of mine out and is walking around in the world with it. When asked earlier today to explain the difference between the love of your husband and the love of your child I quickly responded saying, “I would die for my husband. No questions asked. I would jump in front of a bullet and not blink an eye. For my child, I would start a war. Meet Mama Bear.” Love them both fiercely and passionately, but very much so differently.

I didn’t appreciate the real meaning behind Mother’s Day until now. It is the one day out of the year celebrating the amazing mother’s we have in our lives. And yes, we should do that every day, but I can be the first to admit that I did not know how much my mom was doing for us when we were growing up. I didn’t grasp how above and beyond she was. In my eyes, she was just my mama doing what she always does and I took that for granted. So, mama, I know that you are reading this and I want you to know that you were right that ‘I wouldn’t understand until I had my own’. Well, I have my own and I get it now!